She’d Be There For Me
I lay in bed thinking about what is to come. I never imagined myself getting married at 18 but then again I never really imagined myself with anyone. Ok I’ve had crushes on many people but none of them were ever the right one and look at me now I’ve never had a boyfriend and now I have a fiancé. A beautiful fiancé who has probably had girls chasing after him seen he was 12. Just the thought of girls wanting him irritates me, which reminds me of Lucy which just irritates me even more. Would Henry look at me different if he knew he was my first kiss, my first everything. I mean we’re getting ready to plan our wedding and these are things that he should know about me, no matter how awkward the conversation maybe. I need to know what happened to his parents and he needs to know why I went running into the forest.
The thoughts of all the things I have yet to tell Henry overcome me and I drift to sleep. That night I dream of Catherine, us laugh thinking about our future, planning on spending every inch of it together. We make plans to go to the same college and to become roommates. We make plans to become working ladies, living together while climbing the working ladder. Then we plan to get married and live right next to each other so that as our children grow up they can also become best friends. I awake with tears falling down my face, all these plans will never happen. I have no doubt that I would have somehow dragged Catherine here with me and we would gush over Henry together. She’d be my maid of honor, she’d help me plan my wedding and be there to tell me which dress looked amazing on me and which ones were hideous. She’d be standing by my side as I said “I do”, she’d be the godmother to my children, she’d be my best friend till the day I died. Now shes nothing just goon and I’m left here wondering what happened. Why was I so blind, so stupid, why didn’t I think. Why didn’t I know that something was wrong, I should have known maybe there could have been something I could have done to stop it or maybe I could have said goodbye. Told her how much I loved her before she left the world. I wish Henry was here so I could have someone to tell me that everything was going to be ok because it just doesn’t feel ok now. My heart is broken and I don’t know how long it will be this way. I keep thinking that it will get easier but it never does I just learn to think about it less. As much as I want to share this with Henry I don’t know if I can, it pains me to even think about Catherine let alone have to talk to another person about it.
I cry myself to sleep and when I wake it is morning. The day I shall announce to everyone that I will be marrying Henry. As much as I love Henry I can’t marry him, not till I tell him what brought me to Forêt and not till I know more about him and his parents.