Our Future Or No Future

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Our Future Or No Future

 

I wake up and my heart is beating so fast that I can’t catch my breath. I wipe away the tears that have fallen from my eyes while I was dreaming. It just felt so real and it can’t be real, I won’t let it be, this can’t ever happen.

I’m knocked out of the memories of my horrible nightmare by the touch of Henry’s arms wrapping around me. I didn’t even realize where I am, but as I look around the room and see Henry’s beautiful mural of the forest, I know that I’m safe in Henry’s room. It puts my heart at ease to see this familiar place and to feel the warmth that radiates off Henry. I lay next to Henry feeling safe and at home yet I’m afraid to close my eyes. I’m afraid of what I’ll see if I do. Even thinking about it makes me want to cry. All I can see is Henry’s face as he falls to the ground, then the heartbreak, then the darkness. I turn to Henry he’s so beautiful sometime it’s hard to believe he’s real, to believe he’s laying next to me. Beautiful pale skin, dark copper hair, pink lips, he’s like a dream. A dream that I don’t want to disturb, I don’t believe that he’s somehow mix up in my crazy life. Why am I doing this to him, I keep telling myself it’s just a dream and it’s never going to happen but in my heart I don’t believe it. Do I tell Henry about my dream, do I keep it to myself. The fact that this isn’t my first time having this dream, do I tell him and darken our future together or do I keep it to myself and hope that it never happens.

I guess we rushed in so fast and fell so hard that it’s to late; I can’t help falling for Henry each day. I can’t help feeling that a life without Henry’s isn’t a life worth living. If I don’t tell him this could be our future but if I do tell him this could be the thing that tears us a part, the thing that breaks us. But isn’t it better for him to have a future without me then, to not have one with me?

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